perhaps [adv.] ; red lines ?

I'm standing on the red line. one step forward and an increase in danger by 5 %. another step and an increase of 15 %. those numbers are all pretense but assumingly. however, if I pretend time froze and walked forward... then in my mind that danger is nonexistent. If time froze in my mind, even in the midst of chaos I'd be standing straight and tall... blindly having faith in vague mindlessness. It's totally ridiculous... what makes me wonder of such behavior though? is it the silent response to my heart's desire and the frustration that suffocates my mind that leads my thoughts astray to such vague mindlessness? perhaps.
for reasons unstated due to the depth of their shame, my thoughts are blank with the exception of those reasons. it may be that to avoid thinking of those troublesome matters that I am distracting myself by focusing on unimportant elements and bizarre spontaneous what ifs. is this what they call abstract? was abstract thinking born from blank souls desperate to fill the voids that was supposed to be their minds with some color no matter how crazily it developed? perhaps.

perhaps..

perhaps